This is the technical blog of Keyvan Nayyeri, a 29 years old software engineer at Match.Com, speaker and author. You will find content about computer science, programming, and technology on here.
Those people around us who are always energetic, social, open, strongest, and try to make others happy are typically the people who have the deepest personalities and most painful experiences in their lives and are the most sensitive ones yet they’re matured up in these difficulties to digest them and let others have good moments, those who cannot handle basic issues in front of them. Those who are always caring about others and help them are the ones who really need the care. These people are hiding something deep, so deep, behind that smile all the time.
29 years ago in the western city of Kermanshah in Iran in middle of the last classic war in human’s history between Iran and Iraq, less than 300 miles from the battlefield a boy was born, a boy who was the tallest and heaviest baby in that busy hospital for that day. A random pick from Hafiz’s poems gave him a proposed name of Yousef/Joseph but his family decided to go with Keyvan, an ancient Persian name that originally meant Saturn and in modern days it means the Universe. He had to live his life in different cities and towns with his mom far from his dad to stay safe from the danger of death, a war! Later on he grew up to read and learn a lot, and he learned how disastrous a war can be with huge effects that cannot be undone.
Despite all the difficulties against him in life, that Keyvan boy who eventually developed a severe case of perfectionism and obsession with beauty, passion, and details grew up to build everything he wished exactly according to the plan with every single detail. That boy is not a boy anymore and when he’s honest with himself, he can see the gray hairs on his head, every single one caused by one of those hardships, one of those people he cared about, one of those people who wanted to hurt him, or one of those things that happened to innocent people in full injustice that he couldn’t do anything about. That Keyvan boy is a grown-up man now.
We all age, in fact time is always against us, and it takes so much work, learning, and personal development to put it on our side. The older we become, the faster time goes, and reminds us that there is an end, one of the two definite aspects of every single element in this universe (along with the beginning).
I can’t remember how it passed, I honestly can’t because I was either forced to be busy thinking about other things or I wanted that willingly. A typical person in his or her 20’s wants to have fun and enjoy a duration of time that we call younghood, a convention developed by humans in the society with a heavier focus in modern age for economic and entertainment reasons. I didn’t have that much of an opportunity to have those moments in my life. Again, either I was forced to, or I wanted to but the premise doesn’t change the conclusion in here anyway, and that conclusion is a happy conclusion because I was a good listener to my mentors to do certain things when I didn’t want to.
Now I’m far ahead from the majority of people at my age in many aspects, and the rest of this life is an impossible race for them to catch up with. For a perfectionist like me, that brings the ultimate satisfaction, the satisfaction of starting a conversation with a person and solving him or her in your very strong frame leaving them defeated, and leaving that conversation with total dominance.
At some point in time, I decided that it’s my purpose in life to move between two countries, two countries on two different extremes geographically, politically, religiously, socially, and economically. I imagined it, I developed the plan, and I just did it like many other things in my life. That simple move, simple flight for 25 hours with two bags of clothes, had what I imagined for myself: all the good moments and all the painful events. There is no day passing in my life that I don’t think about the social connections I lost, my family, my close friends, my mentors, and my origin, but I knew this is going to wait for me. I came here driven by what has driven me in life forever: passion!
Yes, it is difficult, it is extremely difficult to live a life as a passionate person. Passion brings drive, consistency, intelligence, style, creativity, novelty, originality, opinion, skills, expertise, knowledge, and wisdom, and you don’t need to be so old to know how society reacts to a person who strives all these at an extreme. People do not like change and it means that the norm is what they are after. With that comes the resistance to any extreme no matter how good, harmless, and constructive those are. Everyday I wake up hoping that I can go to work, to society, to people without the shallow mask I wear most of the times, and on those few occasions like when I write these up here on this blog, I drop that mask and feel so comfortable, the feeling of sunlight hitting my face, and refreshing my skin.
The grand plan for the next 10, 20, and 30 years are all clear in front of me and I’m ready to take on all the challenges to make them happen, simply because it’s the ultimate fun. I’ve put everything up together in the perfect shape I wanted them to be. All in all, I’m very satisfied with this life, life is the most beautiful thing you can ever see and experience, it’s the ultimate design. Just go in the details and you’ll have sleepless nights thinking, crying, laughing, and wandering around with the unique feeling it gives you.
And today is my birthday, I’m now 29. Here is to another year, to my God for giving me the power he hasn’t given to most people, to all the amazing gifts I’m given by him, mentally, physically, and spiritually, to my family for standing by me despite all the hardships, and to myself for being who I have been, a reflection of passion, an example of diligence, a symbol of ongoing change, one of countless presentations of God …